I realized of late that I am going to purge my life of ‘friends’. Most of my friends are non-Christians anyway, and we just do not share the same worldview, where Jesus Christ means everything, and where our world revolves around Him. So hanging out is not gratifying for the most part. Furthermore, friends give you their leftovers from what is left after they give to their families. Therefore, you are never really on the inner tier of their love, affection, and consideration, but more on the outskirts of it. I have found they share their TRUE feelings and their true selves with their families, and are more ‘on their best behavior’ with me.
Yet this is not how Jesus commanded it to be. He clearly stated that our families are those who do the will of the Father in Heaven. The church, who are truly abiding in Christ and in God’s word are, and should be, our family, and should be just as close to us as our blood family, or even closer if our blood family does not do the will of God! However, as with so many other facets of Christianity, this has also become tainted with worldly notions so that most Christians don’t ever really understand, much less think about, what it means to treat your Christian family as your REAL family. They still think that their blood kin are commanded to come first. And that is just not true.
I desire my FAMILY> Family as a Christian are those brothers and sisters and mothers who do the will of God, and who treat me like their kin, regardless of blood relatedness. However, because Christians tend to hold non-blood-kin at arms’ length (as already explained) it is nigh on impossible to attain that kind of spiritual family which Jesus spoke of. So I am a sister and mother without my family in Christ. Just when I think I am obtaining brothers and sisters in Christ, they pull away or put the familiar distance there that the world says it appropriate for ‘friends’. This is another reason I do not desire friendship: it always feels like a consolation prize for what God really intended for His chosen people.
Unfortunately, my children are not my family because they do not claim Jesus Christ as their savior nor do they try to live in God’s will. If I had a Christian family as it should be, I would no doubt be closer to them than I am with my own flesh and blood children. The reason is because without the common ground of Jesus Christ, we are basically strangers inhabiting the same house.
Friendship for me means settling and living lower than God desired for me. I would rather be a recluse and focus all my time and attention on God and doing His will–whatever it might be–than waste my precious time with non-believers and Christians who just don’t find me worthy of calling ‘Sister’.
I also seek my Godly mate, my husband. Until God takes that yearning from my heart, I will seek him. God willing, He keep my husband safe, and present me before him, at which time he will happily claim me and rename me, as Man did with Ayshah, the first man and woman.
Cast those not my family away from me Lord, unless it be Your will that I minister to them. Grow for me my spiritual family in Christ, and send my husband to me, if it be Your will.